its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
