We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
PANTIES FOUND
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