Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
