FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
