So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize