it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize