I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3