I want to have your abortion
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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