he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
