Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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