Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
