I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize