It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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