You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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