I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
smell my finger.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
