She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Randomize
