ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
