My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I look better un-naked...
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
