Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
