So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
We need to rekindle our bromance
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
