try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize
