you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
