remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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