you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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