Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm too high and old for this...
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
