she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
