I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
