Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
