Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
