even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Two words: blizzard sex
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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