Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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