Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She swung at the pinata with crutches
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
