where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
