That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Randomize
