i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
