Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
