Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
