it's too hot outside to masturbate.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
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Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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