How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
