I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
