He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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