God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Randomize
