Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse