Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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