I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I have surprise drugs for everyone
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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