If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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