SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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