i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
