I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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