this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I cut my penus on the lid.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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