Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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