Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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